tailoredceremonies.com Blog

I’ve long been a fan of aisle runners as a small detail that has a big impact for wedding ceremonies. Heather Lee, Assistant Editor of Brides Local Magazines, blogs about great, artistic runners today on the Wedded Bits blog. The company, Artistic Aisles, has lovely personalized runners in designer colors. They give maximum visual pop to the bride walking down (especially with petals or leaves scattered along the edges) and a great prop for photos. The detailed art runners are more expensive (custom hand-painted runners start at $450), but they do have others for less. I love the idea of a bright-colored runner as a sharp contrast to a white dress.

Thanks, Heather, for blogging about this!

It’s that time of year again. Brides Across America found bridal shops across the country to donate dresses to veterans or brides marrying military deployed to Afghanistan or Iraq.

As many of you know, I married my husband with three days notice before he was deployed to the Persian Gulf.

I know what it’s like to be thinking about so many other things, not to mention the financial concerns. I applaud those donating gowns to the couples.

If you are looking to get married here at the Jersey Shore, you don’t need to wait until Veterans Day to receive a discount.

And, as always, military men and women with deployment orders to Afghanistan or the Persian Gulf can have a short, legal ceremony here in Ocean County for free. Other military are entitled to a deep discount. If you are in the military and looking for a wedding officiant, contact me today. Visit my site at TailoredCeremonies.com.

Perhaps because we are at the shore couples ask me for more information about sand ceremonies.It’s a natural fit with beach ceremonies, but you can also have a ceremony away from the beach, too.

On the beach, couples put the sand below their feet into a container creating a keepsake of the moment and the location. Away from the beach, colored sands from smaller containers are combined into a larger container. Unlike a unity candle, the sand won’t blow out on the beach.

Let’s start with the ceremony on the beach.

This is a great way to include children in the ceremony, and it opens up a tremendous opportunity for photographs. It appeals to children naturally. If you want hands to stay clean(er), provide small scoops or shovels. The wording of the ceremony usually has to do with the ground where you marry being sacred and keeping a piece of that with you.

One family had a glass cube that sealed shut etched with the names of the children around the sides, and the couple’s names, the date, and the name of the beach on the top. The cube had a seal and they planned to superglue the lid on when they got home. Lovely keepsake. Other couples chose an open container that they added a few shells and pebbles to as they walked along the water’s edge after the ceremony. The size is up to you–how big do you want the finished product to be? Where will you keep it? How many people will be adding to it? Consider a funnel if you choose a container with a small neck. Decide if you will have a small amount of sand put into the container or if you want to add a few handfuls and choose the appropriate size container. You don’t want to end up with a large container with sand barely covering the bottom.

This photo is a sand ceremony I did at the Adventure Aquarium in Camden. Kristin, the bride, wanted the sand because it seemed like a perfect fit with the aquarium behind us. I’m holding the container that they are pouring into. Doug Burns of Candid Moments Photography did a great job shooting that wedding, by the way.

When doing a sand ceremony with sand from smaller containers, consider several variables.

First, determine if you are going to use sand from a beach or packaged sand. If you are marrying someone who is also from a coastal area, blending the sands from those two locations would be meaningful. The sand from Sandy Hook, New Jersey, is different from the sand of Island Beach State Park, Long Beach Island, or Cape May, so you may visually end up with a contrast, too. If you are using packaged sand, you can choose your favorite colors, your wedding colors, colors that match your decor at home, or colors that have symbolism to the two of you. If you are having children participate, you can either have each person have a color or divide it by family. If you and your future spouse already have a child together, you could premix the sand colors of the two of you into the container for your child to pour during the ceremony.

Consider the individual containers each person will pour from. Some people like the look of taller, thinner vases or bottles. Other prefer something smaller. You may want to use containers with a small spout to aid in the pouring. Don’t forget that on your wedding day, nerves may be a factor–don’t choose something that requires precision and a steady hand. One couple used test tubes and blended their sand into a large flask. Other couples have chosen decoratively shaped bottles.

Finally, decide what kind of container you want to keep your final product in. You can choose large or small, clear or frosted glass–your imagination can come into play here. One company, T & K Young Online sells hourglass containers you can fill. See the photos on their blog here. The laser-engraved keepsakes are pricey but a lovely touch.

Most of the ceremonies talk about how the sand granules, while individual, cannot be unmingled, just as your lives cannot be unmingled.

Remember that the sand ceremony uses the same symbolism as the unity candle, so you use this in place of the candle ceremony, not in addition to it.

Today I took a trip to Barnegat and Manahawkin to visit some other vendors.

WOW.

I have lived in Ocean County my entire life, and I have seen a lot of changes. The elegance and upscale feel of the businesses I visited today is unlike anything people expect when they are here. The shore is casual, a flip-flop and t-shirt vibe a lot of the time. But, let me tell you: you don’t need to go to the city to have an elegant boutique experience. It is all right here.

Let me tell you first about a stop I made today at PEARL, a lovely dress shop featuring special occasion dresses by some of the most popular designers. I wish this store had been open for my wedding six years ago. I wish it had been open two years ago when I needed a dress for my brother’s wedding.

PEARL is located on Route 9 where Carroll’s used to be, in a cute plaza of new storefronts. The tagline is “Simply Elegant.” It certainly fits.

Everything about this store says “boutique.” Racks are arranged neatly, and everything is in its place, a far cry from some places where clothes are shoved onto racks. They have mother of the bride and groom dresses, cocktail dresses, bridesmaid dresses, wedding guest dresses, and even prom dresses, if you are looking for something upscale and not something to wear to a club.

Carey, the owner, is friendly and accommodating. Stop by and look around.

As a wedding officiant, I am often asked how to include children in the ceremony. If the children belong to one or both of the partners getting married and they are under 18, then it is important to use the opportunity to reinforce that they are part of the new family being created, not part of an old one being left behind.

Sand ceremonies and unity candles are great options, but at a networking meeting for wedding vendors the other evening, I discovered a wonderful way to “gift” the children during the ceremony: not just any jewelry, but handmade jewelry.

Sometimes people are worried that the children may lose expensive jewelry given as part of the ceremony or they are concerned about the costs. Local bead store Just Bead It (which has stores in Surf City, North Beach Haven, and Stone Harbor, making them a perfect choice for Long Beach Island or Jersey Shore weddings!) not only lets you make your own jewelry, they give classes to show you how to do it! During the winter, they are flexible about which classes they offer.

Whether you make taking the children along and share in the creation of a necklace or bracelet or make them in advance, handcrafted, do-it-yourself wedding jewelry is a unique way to show how much you care without breaking the budget.

I’ll cover other ways to use handcrafted jewelry to make a statement, save your budget, or bond with friends in another post.

For now, imagine a ceremony where you affirm your love for your children in your new blended family and mark the occasion with a handcrafted necklace or bracelet. I like it much better than the “Family medallion” that seems more commercial and expected.

What do you think?

The biggest trend I’m seeing lately is brides choosing to walk themselves down the aisle or walking down with their groom. Some see walking alone as a show of independence, a sign that they are making their own choice in who to marry. The symbolism of bride and groom entering together is also one that their lives are joined, and they are both choosing to take this journey together.

Either way, whether brides make this choice because of complicated family issues or a sense of their own individuality, it always makes for a lovely entrance.

Many brides and grooms are also deciding to have both sides walk down the aisle, escorted by family. And it’s not just parents: grandparents, siblings, aunts and uncles…processionals can also be a family affair. This choice does offer a personal moment with the family, a chance for loved ones to give their parting advice, to kiss you on the cheek. This produces an intimate moment, and the photos of it can be priceless.

It’s hard to choose, sometimes, with blended families bringing step-fathers, uncles, and grandparents into the mix when it comes time to decide who to walk down the aisle with. If you are diplomatic in explaining your choices, you may be able to smooth over any friction caused by your decision and ultimately give you the moment you want.

The blog had some technical hosting difficulties, and some of the files seem to be gone. However, some of the old files are still here. The good news is, I have some amazing ideas on what to do here, so look for big changes!

Congratulations, Chris and Keith! After surviving a near-monsoon, these two gentlemen finally tied the knot in front of family, friends, and television cameras!

In an episode entitled “You may now kiss the…groom?” these two men celebrated their love at Nine in Hoboken, an area I usually don’t serve but I could not say no to these two! The affair was coordinated by amazing planner Samantha Goldberg of Gold Events & Co . Despite the cake being swept away in the flood, the party continued.

Thank you, gentlemen, for such an amazing day. I won’t forget it. Cheers!

What a fun wedding! After a ceremony that was trimmed to avoid nearly all speaking on the part of the groom, Leslie, Jack, and the whole family celebrated in grand style! Bravo to the chocolate fountain, too! Wishing you many years of happiness together.

An Italian-themed wedding! Best wishes for a lovely life together!