Many couples have questions about the processional. The general order has the groom enter first, followed by the grandparents, the parents, the groomsmen, the maids of honor, the flower girl/ring bearer, and the bride and her escort.

But you don’t need to follow this. It is up to you whether the officiant is waiting before it all begins, or if the officiant walks down the aisle. If you are having a small, intimate wedding, a processional may not be appropriate, or the path can be through trees or a garden–it does not have to be a center aisle. Grandparents may need to already be seated, as may parents, in some cases.

Brides are no longer escorted by just their fathers–our changing world and changing circumstances mean this job may be performed by the mother, an uncle, an older brother, a stepfather, both parents…. You need to look at your circumstances and negotiate what would be most appropriate for everyone. If you have an uncle who helped raise you when you were young and your mother remarried, for example, then you may choose to have your uncle walk you down half way and have your stepfather meet you and walk you the rest of the way, if you are particularly close to him. They may both walk you down the entire aisle, if you choose. Perhaps your brother is old enough to do the job alone, and choosing him would avoid hurting your uncle’s feelings.

I have seen brides walk down the aisle alone, and when the question is asked, “Who gives this woman?” her maid of honor, or her parents, may say, “No one gives her, for no one can.”

For older brides or brides who have been living with their grooms, I have seen fathers walk the bride half way down the aisle and the groom meet them half way, to finish walking her down.

And in some cultures, the bride and groom walk down the aisle together.

The key to this is finding what reflects your relationships best, as well as what fits the event itself.